The Ties That Bind

It has been said that in a world intricately and inexorably connected, individually, we seem to draw apart from one another.   That those connections we have are tenuous, virtual and of little lasting substance or effect.   Like spiderwebs on the wind, we connect and (temporarily) bond with whatever object we come in contact with, only to be pulled apart and float until the next object enters our space.   We see this in our personal and professional relationships on a regular, daily basis.   And yet, every now and then we are reminded of the ties that bind – that survive the immediacy of the moment no matter their outward, gossamer appearance; which bespeak a deeper level of common interest and shared values.   We are reminded, if you will, that no man is indeed, an island.

The events of the past few weeks have underscored the above for me.   In no short order, I learned of the loss of three persons of note to myself, and to many others around them.   They were many things to many different people – writer, poet, leader, aviator; but in the end they each, in their own way, made a difference.   There was CAPT Carroll LeFon – Lex to almost everyone, whose legacy and loss has been chronicled here and across the web.   His writing is timeless, coming from the head and heart with the rare ability to find common points of intersection with his readers and relate a story in such manner that even those who never tasted salt air or viewed the world through sun-drenched canopy could readily relate.   We saw that gift brought to life last night at our gathering in DC and across the nation and the world as people from all walks of life came together to pay honor to his legacy.   But did you know that three of the JOs under him when he was a VFA squadron CO so many years ago screened for command this past week?   There’s a living legacy for you.

On the way to the wake last night I also learned of the passing of CAPT Ed Caffrey, USN-ret.   Himself a gifted aviator, CAPT Caffrey was a leader and pillar of the Hawkeye/Greyhound community.   The term “people person” is overworked to the point of material failure in this day and age, but he was an original in that manner.   There are today, many a former VAW and VRC CO, XO and Department Head who were mentored (again, an overwrought but apropos word here) during his tenure as CO and AEW wing commodore.   More than a few of us, myself included, owe a deep debt of gratitude for his support and advocacy on our behalf and on the behalf of the VAW/VRC community.   Easy words to say now, but there was a time when the community had, shall we say, less than enthusiastic support at the CVW level and higher because of the “support” label broadly brushed on anything that didn’t have an “F” or “A” in the 2-letter designator (and if it had an “H” or ended with a W or Q, well, bonne chance mon ami and don’t let the hatch hit you on the way out).   More than that, he cared deeply about people – his people, be they residents on the Breezy Point seawall, his nav division on JFK, students at Naval War College or even later, students at Valley Forge Academy.   Just ask the recipients of the VAW/VRC Memorial Fund which he took the lead in establishing.   He made a difference.

And there was Jeff Huber – a retired Hawkeye NFO and writer with a pen of steel and a mind of sharper wit.   Jeff was another ground breaker for the Hawkeye community, as Skippy-san so very eloquently lays out in a fine tribute over at his site today.   Jeff had the courage and determination to drag E-2 tactics out of the moribund 50’s and 60’s and lay the foundation for the missions that lay just over the horizon — Kosovo, Desert Shield/Storm, Southern Watch, OEF and OIF. Later he took that same determination and sought to be a conscious for a Service and country that seemed determined to ignore its roots and founding principles.   I didn’t always agree with his assertions – but they provided a reference point and more importantly, a prompt for me to evaluate and re-evaluate my own assumptions and analyses.   Too often today people want to reside in the “amen” section and decline to think critically for themselves – deferring instead to the opinions and assertions of others whose best or only attribute is their shrillness.

Different paths, with seemingly random co-mingling or intersections – what are the ties that bind?   In each case you are witness to someone who deeply cared about their nation, their Service and the people under their charge or in association.   Each, in uniform and in retirement, sought to continue to serve, in their own way and do what they could to better their fellow humans and the Navy to which they had dedicated a substantive part of their life in its service.   Some few years back the Navy was casting about for a definition of ethos.   I and several others demurred on the end, corporately derived and committee driven statement that emerged from the “process” preferring instead to point to the 200+ years of example driven ethos and the principles detailed therein.   Of things like service before self, courage in the face of overwhelming opposition – of conviction and standing firm for principles when all else was sinking beneath the waves.   If I were asked today for more recent examples, I can think of none finer than the three I highlight above — outstanding aviators, naval officers without peer and human beings who cared deeply about and for their fellow mankind.

And I am honored to have worn the uniform and served with them.



  1. Very nicely said, SJS. I’m hoping that we all can pick up the slack and carry forward. We’ve lost some of our crew, the the mission isn’t over yet. There’s always more to do it seems.

    Myself, I’m trying to block out some time to finish a few articles I’ve started, then to get back into writing in earnest. There’s a lot of Cold-War ASW memories that need preserving before they too are lost. I can only provide a few snapshots here and there, but I believe it’s still important to preserve them before they are lost forever.


  2. Thanks for reminding us of the contributions of others.

    And reference the Navy ethos, far too often the push becomes to memorize the words, but not to live the creed.

    Your pushback against that was wise.

    Deeds, not words.

  3. Bj Armstrong

    In the first century of our Service’s existence, in the days of men like Decatur, Porter (Sr & Jr), and Farragut, before we tried to evoke our brothers/sisters from the Corps with “Semper Fortis” or other struggles with mottos or creeds (that continue to be brought up because our business management classes tell us all we must have “mission statements” that are new and exciting) the Navy had an unofficial motto. It was never codified in policy statement or congressional decree, it was made real instead through wardroom toasts and battle speeches, and inscribed over the doors of The Naval Academy Chapel. Belief in this precept has been joined by other names like LeFon, Caffrey, and Huber…and continues to be lived by the few who serve their nation at sea. To borrow a phrase with pop-culture currency, Damn Few.

    — Non Sibi Sed Patriae … Not for Self, but Country —

  4. virgil xenophon

    Eloquent thoughts, from a professional thinker, SJS. As JFK famously said: “Life is not fair.” Or to paraphrase Heinlein: “military aviation is a harsh mistress.” Yes, life goes on, but it won’t be the same–a cliche I know, but a truism nevertheless. The take-away? Praise and honor those people one loves and respects in the hear and now, don’t have regrets when they go about things left unsaid..

  5. virgil xenophon

    *” and now”–can’t even get the simple things straight it seems..

  6. Steeljaw Scribe

    ‘tsok … Lots that doesn’t seem to work quiet right of late. I’m blaming the Mayans myself 😉
    W/r, SJS

  7. "BC" Combs

    Well said! Great losses to all who knew them!

  8. The events of this past week have got me thinking as well. Mainly, I’ve decided to not put off meeting people I respect or failing to let my voice be heard where appropriate. Remember the 1300+ comments on Lex’s site? How many of those had never met him and/or were “lurkers” who never commented? I, too, could’ve been one of those folks. But seeing that Lex lived in “Sandy Eggo,” I took a deep breath and emailed him to see if we could meet sometime for lunch. So thankful that I did that now, as it allowed me to get to know the man behind the screen.

    I guess what I’m trying to say is this: in this age of text/email/blogs/Facebook and other methods of “virtual” interaction, don’t let those replace the actual, physical relationships. I know it’s not always possible – we often live hundreds or thousands of miles apart from those we interact with – but our phones usually work just fine.

    So SJS, be prepared – next time I’m in Old Dominion (I grew up in Va Beach/Norfolk) I’m looking you up, pal!

  9. Padre – you would be most welcome 🙂 Give me a heads-up offline and we’ll make it happen.
    w/r, SJS

  10. I am sorry to hear of Captain Caffery’s passing. He was the Navigator on the JFK when I was an OOD. I have not heard of him since I left the ship. He was an Outstanding Naval Officer.

  11. Day VFR Only

    I appreciate the kind words about Ed Caffrey, who worked at Engineered Arresting Systems until his illness took him from us. Ed’s mentoring and thoughful engagement continued here, and made this Attack Puke respect Ed and admire his skills very much. His replacement as Gator on JFK, Scuff Neff, was another excellent sambassador for the community, as was JJ george, a mutual fried also lost recently. It really is about the “who we are”, not the “what we fly”. I had the privilege of flying with JJ George over Iraq in 1991 and enjoyed greatly the experience. My hats off to the Hummers, and the brave folks who fly ’em.

  12. DVO:
    – Scuff and JJ, boy there’s a couple more names from my misspent youth. I can proudly lay claim to being a Scuff trained mole…
    w/r, SJS

  13. Bob Melley

    We very few, we band of brothers…….good men all……sorry to read the above, but proud to have worn the blue and gold in the 1960s…..

  14. Old AF Sarge

    Well done SJS. We must always remember those who went before. Thanks for a great post!

  15. Well said, our gathering in Minneapolis to pay tribute the the great man really brought home how many lives LEX’s passing affected. We drank many a Guinness that night, for strength.

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